There Are Always Other Ships
by Shenokzo
Summary: That ship had sailed as Jane Banks put it. A look at her not so pleasant past relationships leading up to that fateful day when she collided with Jack on Cherry Tree Lane. Rated M just to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

Jane closed the door to her flat and took a deep breath, happy to be home. It had been quite a day. There had been much accomplished but it had been one of those days that left her feeling quite exhausted. She was grateful that the rain at least had held off until the end of the rally, for once the sky opened up there was no escaping getting soaked. Jane had nearly sprinted home the few blocks to her flat and arrived absolutely drenched. It poured for a good half hour but now it had subsided to just a steady rain. There was a gentle rumble of thunder in the distance as she shook off her umbrella and put it in the umbrella stand. Then she proceeded to peel off her dripping coat and hung it up to dry.

Jane made her way across her small foyer and through the swinging door into her kitchen. She put on the kettle for tea, trying not to think of the man she had caught a glimpse of while running home. And as she retrieved a cup and saucer from the cabinet, she certainly tried to avoid the thought of the pretty, and quite young, brunette whose arm was looped through his. And then there was the little boy he was holding tightly as they too dashed through the rain. She caught a glimpse of the life that could have been hers, would have been hers.

Yes, indeed it was Harold Clarke, Jane's ex-fiancé whom she had spotted, happily running through the rain with his family. She was only grateful he hadn't seen her. It had been a few years since they last spoke, but that didn't stop the rush of memories that came flooding back to her.

The kettle whistled and Jane poured herself a cup of tea. She leaned back against her kitchen counter, arms crossed, feeling quite alone in her small yet sufficient kitchen. She wasn't one to dwell on the past and she usually looked very brightly at the present and upon the future. Though every so often she would think back on her previous relationships and wonder if she would have changed things. Would she have done anything different?

No, she wouldn't. She was certain she'd made the right choices regarding the men who had been in her life up until now. Although that didn't change the fact that she walked home to an empty flat every night and sometimes felt quite alone in life.

Certainly, she had her friends at work. She had Michael and her niece and nephews, whom she loved dearly and very much enjoyed visiting. And perhaps she should have been content with that, but in all honesty, Jane wanted someone she could come home to. Someone who would be eager to hear about her day. Someone she could have dinner with every night. She wanted someone who would hug and kiss her when she had a bad day. Or when she had a good day for that matter. Someone she could... love.

As the rain continued its sing song taps on her window panes, Jane sipped her tea and decided what she needed was a good hot bath to wash away the stress of the day. Perhaps she could also wash away the all too complicated emotions she was feeling. Though this was much easier said than done.

She gathered a towel and soaps and let the bath water run, all the while consciously avoiding the thought of any past lover. Jane put on a Boswell Sisters record, one of her favorites, and while she waited for the tub to fill, she forced herself to think of what was on her agenda for tomorrow.

First was breakfast at the union hall, which was right near Michael's house so perhaps she could visit him on the way. Of course, if she stopped at Michael's, she would be taking the same route on which she saw Harold. Oh, and how she hoped she wouldn't run into him again! It was truly a wonder she had been able to avoid seeing him for as long as she did. Who knew how many times they had passed each other in the street without taking notice? And here her brain had arrived back around at thoughts she didn't want to entertain.

As she stepped into the bath she may as well have been plunging into the sea of ghosts of boyfriends past. For it was useless and Jane knew it was nearly impossible to avoid her own thoughts.

She sunk into the hot water and the swirls of steam rose from the water leaving Jane in a cloud of memories.


	2. Chapter 2

Of course, Harold had not been Jane's only boyfriend. Her mind leapt back in time, beyond Harold, to her first romantic relationship.

Jane hadn't had any love interests while she attended school. There were surely many boys who harbored crushes on her while she was a teenager but she really didn't allow herself to become interested in the opposite sex. And her parents, especially her father, were grateful for this.

In truth, she found there was very little time to think about boys what with her studies and the war going on. While London was being bombed, she didn't understand how some of her friends could carry on about romance and which boys they fancied. Jane however did take an active role in helping with the war effort along with her mother who was very involved. She was only grateful Michael was too young to enlist as many of her friends' brothers had.

Upon reflection, these years seemed to go by quite slowly. But at the same time, they were somehow over in a flash and by the time Jane was finished with school, the war had ended. Though she would never wish for another war, part of her did quite like helping with the effort. She most definitely had inherited her mother's qualities in wanting to fight for something that was bigger than herself. But for now, life in London had finally taken a turn for the better and she would by no means complain about that. It was as if a cloud had lifted and with it gone, rays of light and joy returned to life for everyone.

Every year, for as long as Jane could remember, Fidelity Fiduciary Bank held a gala of sorts. Those who worked for the bank were invited to attend with their families. It was quite an extravagant event. Dinner and dancing and merriment commenced and Jane and Michael were allowed to attend in their late teens. Mostly the purpose of this event was for shareholders and other bank employees to hob-nob and make beneficial business acquaintances, but for the family members who attended, it was an opportunity to meet new people. And when Jane had just turned eighteen, this is where she first met Andrew.

Andrew Garridan was the son of a very wealthy and affluent shareholder at the bank. While in the company of his father and his father's colleagues, he was rather serious and mature but when Jane spoke to him, he became quite the comedian. She liked Andrew right away. He seemed to have an endless inventory of amusing stories and jokes to tell and Jane dearly loved to laugh. He was two years older than her, currently attending university, and not to mention he was quite handsome. Tall with sandy blond hair and bright blue eyes. They danced and talked and laughed the whole evening of the night they met.

After acquiring her father's consent, they began courting and spending almost all of their spare time together. It wasn't long before they found themselves sneaking off together, away to hidden corners, and sharing stolen kisses. Their relationship began right after the war had ended. And after the gloom and sorrow of the last few years, everyone, especially the younger generation, was eager to be happy again and to indulge in all forms of amusement.

They went out dancing nearly every night. There were plenty of jazz clubs and dance halls where they would drink and laugh and dance and kiss into the wee hours of the night. Her parents didn't mind her staying out late so long as she was with friends and not just Andrew. Her father went to bed rather early and always assumed Jane returned before midnight. Her mother would sometimes wait up for her but often times chose to go to bed as well. Perhaps they were a bit too lenient in this way but, Jane was a responsible young woman and they trusted her as she never gave them any reason to worry.

She remembered one night in particular when they were walking home after an evening of drinking and socializing with friends. Both Jane and Andrew were far from sober and tried their best to control the volume of their voices as they, not so gracefully, strolled down a quiet lane.

"Jane, why couldn't we just go back to my dormitory?" he asked with a devious look in his eyes. "No one would be awake. I could sneak you round the back and have you spend the night with me."

Jane continued walking. "And what would happen when my parents wake up and realize I never returned. I'm sure my father would have the whole of Scotland yard out searching for me," she laughed.

"I'd have you back home before sun up."

"No you wouldn't," she smiled and pecked him on the lips. "By the time we got to the university campus on the other side of town and then back to my house, we'd never make it back in time."

He let out a long sigh. "You know you really drive me quite mad sometimes. Its torture having to wait."

Then he kissed her hard, backing her up until they were against a nearby building, his body pressed up along hers. His hands finding their way up under her shirt as he trailed messy kisses down her neck. He did seem rather impatient in this aspect of their relationship but Jane appreciated that he mostly respected her wishes in wanting to wait. They never went all the way but the things they did do would most definitely cause other ladies to blush. She too had done her own exploring below his belt buckle and was not unfamiliar with what went on under his trousers. But her friends had told her much more scandalous tales than the ones she had to tell. To Jane there was no harm in indulging in a bit of naughty behavior so long as they never went too far and she retained her virtue until marriage.

And indeed, she did make it back to Cherry Tree Lane that night, still very much a proper young lady in her own opinion and after many more long, passionate, and messy kisses by the back door, she quietly snuck inside and up to bed. Her parents none the wiser that she had returned at nearly three in the morning.

Jane and Andrew's courtship continued for nearly two years. During this time, Jane got a job as a typist at the bank. She desperately wanted to go to university but her father thought it a silly idea. What use was it to send a girl for further schooling? Though her mother thought she should be allowed to attend university, her father had the final say in the matter and while he was not cruel about it, he just didn't see the point when she would ultimately end up in the role of wife and mother. And perhaps he was right about that; you didn't need a degree to do those things. But her father did know Jane would not be happy unless she was doing something to keep busy. So, in the end he proposed she apply for the position that had opened for a typist at the bank and, being the daughter of George Banks, she was basically given the job.

Her life suddenly seemed very neatly planned out for her. She worked at the bank and courted Andrew though his years at school and while they never spoke the words out loud, there was a basic understanding between the two of them, and both of their families for that matter, that when he graduated, he would have his job at the bank and they would marry and start their lives together.

And this all very well may have happened had it not been for the events that took place on a beautiful day in mid spring. Andrew would be graduating in a few weeks time, they would start planning their wedding, find a flat to let, and be married. Jane was excited and though Andrew didn't show quite as much enthusiasm, she explained it away owing to the fact that he was quite busy with his studies. Quite busy he may have been, but if only Jane had known it had little to do with his studies.

Jane had been pouring over newspapers any time she had a spare moment at work, looking for flats she and Andrew would be able to afford. It was likely Andrew's parents would have insisted on buying them their first home in a more upscale part of town, but Jane being the independent woman she was, wanted to be able to find a place that would truly be their own and not because it had been gifted to them.

She was thrilled when she read an advertisement for a single bedroom flat very near to the bank and quite affordable. She quickly phoned the owner and asked if she could see it the following day. She left work, newspaper in hand, right as Big Ben chimed the hour, eager to be out of the stuffy office and eager to tell Andrew the good news. She smiled the entire walk to the university. She knew Andrew would most likely be in his dormitory or the library.

A quick scan of the library showed no sign of him so she made her way to the dormitory. Jane knocked upon his door but didn't wait for a response before opening it.

There would have been no way could she have prepared herself for the scene which met her eyes. Andrew and her good friend Ruth Ashton were tangled in the sheets of his bed. Andrew on top of her, her bare legs wrapped around his waist, both of them in rapid motion and letting out labored moans.

Her stomach dropped and she stood there absolutely stunned and frozen in place until Ruth's eyes met hers. Ruth let out a gasp which seemed to knock Jane out of her stupor. She stepped back and pulled the door quickly shut, hand still on the knob to steady herself. She was shaking and felt as though she was going to be physically sick.

Her feet somehow managed to lead her down the hallway, out of the building, and a bit of a distance away before she bent over and was sick in the grass next to a patch of pansies. The walk home was a blur, though she was well aware that Andrew did not come after her.

She did not hear from him for over a week. He didn't call, he didn't visit. And during those days she fell into a depressed sort of trance. She skipped meals due to her non-existent appetite. She didn't speak to anyone at work, she didn't speak to anyone at home. And after a few days, Michael decided to approach her and ask what had happened. It was so unlike Jane to be like this.

She left out the details but told him enough that he understood Andrew was a cad and it now all made sense. It broke his heart to see his sister so miserable.

Finally, one evening after dinner, Andrew did arrive unannounced.

Jane and her parents sat in the parlour. Her father reading his newspaper, her mother drinking her tea, and Jane sitting on the sofa with a book in her lap. She had been staring at the same page for fifteen minutes, her mind very much elsewhere. Michael most likely would have been upstairs sketching.

The doorbell rang and Ellen went to answer it. She was surprised to see Andrew at the door but let him in. She, like Jane's parents, had no idea anything had happened between he and Jane the week prior.

When Ellen entered the room and announced Andrew, Janes heart skipped a few beats and she couldn't make herself turn to look at him.

He entered the room and came around the sofa into Jane's view. He appeared a bit remorseful but not nearly as pitiful as she thought he would have been.

"Oh Andrew how good to see you." Her father stood and shook his hand. "I understand it's only a few more weeks until you're finished at university. Myself and the others quite look forward to you joining us at the bank."

"Thank you, sir. I look forward to it as well." He paused awkwardly for a moment. "Uh, may I request a private audience with Jane."

Her parents smiled to each other then gave Jane what they thought was a knowing look. Jane looked rather pallid, which her parents did observe, but they assumed it was due to the nerves of the conversation they believed was about to take place. It made Jane queasy as she realized they thought he was here to propose.

They left the room hastily leaving Jane sitting alone in a chair beside the fireplace. She wanted to run from the room but she also wanted to scream at him and another part of her wanted to punch his handsome face. She didn't do any of those things. Instead she sat stuck to the sofa not sure if she would be able to move even if she tried.

He sat down next to her, they were both quiet for a few moments, then he began.

"Thank you for seeing me this evening."

She found her voice, "I really wasn't given much choice. Though I did begin to wonder how long it would take for you to work up the courage to talk to me."

"It really wasn't a matter of courage." He spoke plainly. "I knew you would be angry after what you saw and I thought it better to let you calm down for a few days before we spoke."

The amount of emotions running through Jane in that moment were difficult to contain and she tried her best to compose herself.

"Well, you were quite wrong about that. Your absence has only caused me to become more confused and more angry and," she paused willing herself not to cry but failing. "And more heartbroken than ever."

"Jane…"

"How could you Andrew?" she asked, turning to him, as tears began to fall.

She hadn't cried once since that moment last week and she was so angry with herself for letting it all come out now in front of him. She felt like a fool.

"Jane please don't be so upset. It's not so terribly uncommon for a bloke to dabble with a few other women before he's settled down." He went take her hand.

She pulled away. "A few?"

"Well yes," he continued as he stood up. "Now that it's out, I feel there really is no point in lying to you. There have been a few."

Jane felt as though she would be sick again. She continued to cry silently the dim firelight catching each glinting tear that trailed down her cheeks.

Andrew went on, now pacing slowly in front of the fire. "And besides how can you really blame me? I wouldn't have been with other women if you had… you know."

Jane looked up at him in astonishment.

"If I'd slept with you?" she asked incredulously.

"Well yes. Hasn't it occurred to you that it is partially your fault that this happened?"

If this was supposed to be an apology, it was seriously lacking.

"So I'm to understand," she asked, "that this is my doing? The fact that it feels as though my heart's being ripped from my chest is my own fault?"

"Jane, I am trying to apologize. I really wish you wouldn't make this so difficult for me."

"Difficult for you?"

"Yes, difficult for me!" He seemed to be getting a bit aggravated that this wasn't panning out as simply as he thought it would. "Just accept that I'm sorry and let us move on. My parents as well as yours expect us to be married in the next weeks and it would be better if we could just put this behind us. I am sorry you had to find out this way, that you had to find out at all, really but I cannot change what's happened."

Jane, with some difficulty, managed to find her resolve. She loved Andrew. She had loved him for so long and had imagined a perfect life with him which he had managed to crumbled away in a matter of days. And he didn't even seem to be apologizing for what he had done, more so he only seemed sorry that she had found him out. The image of him and Ruth in bed together would not soon leave her mind and she would never truly be able to trust him again. She knew she could not stay with him.

"We're not getting married," she said finally. "I accept your apology, if you could really call it that, but there is no way I could marry you after what you have done." She stood and walked towards the foyer with the intention of showing Andrew to the door. "I must ask you to leave."

Jane found Michael sitting on the stairs, much like they had when they were children trying to listen to their parents' conversation. No doubt he had heard everything as they hadn't exactly kept their voices down. But she didn't mind.

Andrew observed Michael. "It's a bit rude don't you think? Listening in on others' private conversations?"

"You certainly would know about rude behavior," Michael responded and went to stand beside his sister who had opened the front door.

Andrew scoffed and turned to Jane. "Is that really it then? Two years? You've decided to just throw it all away?"

"I'm not the one throwing it away, Andrew!" Jane said, tears still falling. "Yes, you've apologized but you've also blamed me for what has happened which is absurdly unfair. It's really quite cruel of you when your behavior has been so disgusting."

"Oh now let's not be so dramatic, Jane," he said putting on his coat and hat. "And don't act so high and proper. I wouldn't consider you much of a lady after the things you've done with me."

Janes eye's widened in surprise at the insult and Michael didn't hesitate. He swung at Andrew and hit him hard against the jaw, knocking him to the checkered floor of the foyer.

"Michael!" Jane cried.

Andrew quickly regained his footing and went to fight back but Jane stepped in between them. "Andrew, I'm telling you to leave! Get out of our house at once," she said through angry tears.

Andrew straightened his coat and, with as much dignity as he could muster, he left through the open door.

She closed the door and turned to Michael. "I would've hit him myself."

"Oh I don't doubt that," he replied.

A small half smile crept onto her face, the first one in days. She hugged Michael, so grateful he was there.

Their mother and father entered the foyer through the kitchen door. A look of alarm on both their faces.

"Jane, what on earth was all that shouting?" asked their mother. "And where has Andrew gone?"

"I don't believe," Michael answered, "we'll be seeing much of Andrew Garridan anymore."

They didn't see much of Andrew. In fact, they heard very little of him from then on. He was supposed to take up his position at the bank as soon as he graduated. But Jane later found out he decided to travel instead, quite to his father's disappointment, though not to Jane's. It was a relief to know she would not have to work with him.

She was heartbroken for a time and thought herself a simpleton for taking nearly two years to discover he was such a playboy. But, once the storm of the breakup had cleared, she realized she was grateful for what had happened. She wasn't about to make amends with Ruth Ashton but had those events not occurred, had Andrew not been unfaithful, she probably would have married him and would have entered into a marriage littered with deception. And while two years was a long time, it could have carried on for much longer.


End file.
